Hi guys !!! ^__~

So it was my birthday on the 2nd of January, as well as the first day of school on a new year. Isn't it kinda sad to have your birthday on the first day of school?? Like sian lor, wahlao! Then your friends will be like, "eh Gillian, suey sia your birthday on the first day of school/ eh Gillian, who can forget your birthday sia! Every year the first day of school your birthday leh! etc" So the good thing about my birthday is, it's so memorable and easy to remember !!! :D Bad thing is, it's like the first day of school, so the majority of everybody's faces will be looking like this >>>>> -___-
HAHAHAH NEVERMIND, I'm SO USED TO IT PLEASE. EVERY YEAR ALSO the SAME THING, WHAT A SAD LIFE.

So on that day, I went to school as per normal and I received a few presents from my dearest, lovely and cute classmates!

A soft toy bear from Jarran ! A classmate of mine since Secondary 1 all the way till now. My classmate for 4 years !!! Ever since secondary 2, he has always been buying me soft toys every single year for my birthday. Damn act cute sia hahahah !!! But thank you so much !!! <3

A cup from Breelyn !!! She wrote me a letter as well, but I didn't take a photo of it cuz she said it was too ugly LOL but I liked it ofcuz ! Thank you si bak gao (4-eyed turtle) !!! <3 Also, a classmate of mine since Secondary 1 and I will never ever forget how we first met. She and I have the most memorable first time meeting in our secondary school life I swear !! XD How we first met? We were having our CCA orientation that day, and I wanted to make friends. So I started talking to this girl called, "teng teng". Then, later on, we went to try out volleyball and we were sitting down on the floor at the gym. I thought that teng teng was sitting beside me, and I wanted to start a conversation. So I braced myself, turned to my left and asked, "what CCA you want to join ah?" And that was my first conversation with Breelyn HAHAHAH !!! So to my horror, when she turned around, I realised she wasn't teng teng and in my heart, I was like, "oh shit shit shit, who the hell is this person ?! Omg wrong person,  I don't know her omg die ! Awkward lah, omg Gillian just kill yourself now !"  But she did respond to me, saying she doesn't know lah! HAHAHAH ! Even up till now, when we talk about how we first met, we'll be laughing our ass off seriously! So that's how we started knowing each other and now she's one of my best friends in school HEHEH !!! XD

Another cup from Junjie ! Coincidentally, he and Breelyn got me a cup hahahah ! Junjie was my classmate for 2 years, since secondary 1 and 2. Now we're both in a different class but we're still in the same clique hohoho ! He always got me a present for my birthday too, thank you ! <3

Twelve cupcakes from Amos (The brand of the cupcakes is called 12 cupcakes, not there are 12 cupcakes. He bought half a dozen for me as you can see LOL) !!! My first present from him yayyy !!! Thank you !!! ^__~ He's my classmate ever since Secondary 3 ! As you can see, 3 cupcakes all pua tou (fell down), sadly. Nevermind, can eat can already lah !!! :p Furthermore, this is called creativity y'know ! Cuz nice and pretty looking cupcakes are just too mainstream, photos taken of fallen cupcakes are rare okie !!! XD

A bracelet and a note from my dearest Jasmine, aka Pokka green tea !!! <3 (Pokka is a brand of a green tea I love drinking most HAHAH !) She's also my classmate ever since I was secondary 1 all the way till now! Love her so much I swear, thank you lah green tea heheheh !!! :p

A handmade keychain from paolo aka paopao !!!! :D He has also been my classmate since secondary 1 till now hahahah !!! We used to eat pizzahut together with a few of our classmates after school quite a number of times. Such reminiscence. :') Thank you paolo for the gift !!

MY FIRST BIRTHDAY PRESENT FROM MY BIG BROTHER !!!!!! ♡♡♡ HEHEHEHEHEH ALL MY 16 YEARS OF LIFE, FINALLY A PRESENT FROM HIM !! MUACKS KORKOR MUACKS I LOVE YOU !!!! XD ♡

A lipstick and a chopper thumb-drive from Adrian TAN (not adrian my younger brother LOL !) ^__^ He's like the first guy on earth to buy me such a women thing I swear hahahah ! Oh and he searched the entire bugis street just to find something related to One piece for me (Cuz I freaking love one piece !!!) He couldn't find anything but this cute-looking thumb-drive, so he ended up buying this for me hahahah ! Thank you !! ^__^

An Elizabeth Arden perfume from my mother !!! Thank you yozxc mother ! ♡♡♡ Although I've always been a really rebellious, defiant and disobedient daughter, I still love you lah ofcuz. In the past, now and forever, always. :-)

A necklace was given by my dearest Ashlyn !!! <3 This necklace was what I wanted to buy when I went out with her and she bought it for me for my birthday. So sweet :') ! She has also been my classmate since Secondary 1 up till now HAHAH ! She's one of my best friends in school too and I love her so much. I treat her as my younger sister and we have been very close starting of Secondary 3 till now. ^__~ We used to have a lot of disputes and we have fallen out with each other a couple of times too, together with breelyn hahah ! We weren't really in good terms back in the past due to her immaturity. (she agrees to it as well hahahah :p) But that was all in the past, we are now really really close to each other! So glad, blessed and fortunate to have her in my life, to add colours and brighten up my secondary school life. :') Thank you dear ! <3 NEXT.... Me, breelyn and ashlyn went to pizzahut at lot 1 to celebrate my birthday after school !!! ^__^ After eating, we went to pasar malam to walk around and there we found a spot to sit down and take photos! :p None of us were happy with the photos we took with each other, so I suggested taking individual photos HAHAHAH ! So yes, the photos below were taken by Ashlyn heheheh :p !  -Hmmmmm.....- -Wah wah wah I got presents WEEEEEEE !!!! ~ Happygirl98 ! XD- -Appreciating the presents I've received HEHEH ! :p-  -I'm so happy I can die- XD So that's how my birthday was spent with my schoolmates ! ^__^ NEXT... I went to celebrate my birthday with my dearest girl here, huiqi !!! <3 Had dinner together at Plaza singapura's ichiban sushi heheheh !!! ^__~ Huiqi's one of my best's friend in my life and I treat her as my little sister as well. I've known her for 5 years already, she and I were primary school friends! :D Thank you dear for celebrating my birthday with me !!! Love you lots xoxo ♡ -Resolution sucks sorry !!!- So that sums it all for what I have done on my actual birthday !!! ^__^ Next... My dearest cell group members celebrated my birthday for me yesterday !!! <3 Card made by my best friend TOH FAN LEI !!! ♡♡♡ Known her for 7 years already heheheh! DAMN ACT CUTE RIGHT THE CARD HAHAHAHAH !!! I was like asking why the eyes like cock eye like that, then she says cuz my eyes also cock eye -___- LAME PLEASE HAHAH ! Thanks anyways sucker !!! :p  -Cheesecake from my cell group !! <3- That's all for my birthday! ^__^ Thank you once again to each and every one of you out there who had wished me and gave me a present. This year has been my most happy and enjoyable birthday I've spent really. I was really happy and touched when some people came to me and wished me a happy birthday when I'm not really close to them at all. There are some people out there whom I don't even know at all, taking their time and effort to wish me too, and I really appreciate it a lot. Thank you from the bottom of my heart sincerely. :') Now i'm finally 16 and I can watch NC16 movies legally now WAHAHAHAH !!!! XD  But sadly, it's my O levels this year and I need to work damn hard now for my future T^T. Anyways, Good luck to each and every one of you out there who is gonna take your O and N levels !!! :-)  Last but not least, belated Happy New Year to all of you and have a great year ahead !!! xoxo ♡♡♡

HIIIII I'M BACKKK !!!! :D Gonna be blogging about Ipoh since I'm from Ipoh and I wanna show you how it's like. ^__^

Dim sum !!! ^^

Dim sum !

Chee cheong fun !!!

Hi hi you must have been wondering what the heck is that below right?! It's a fruit and nope it's not jackfruit ! It's called Cempedak. It's like a smaller and juicier version of jackfruit and this fruit has always been my most favourite fruit. It's a seasonal fruit and Singapore hardly sells it. It smells and tastes sooo heavenly i swear (to people who dislike durians, you'd probably hate this fruit too hahah ! :p) It may look ugly on the outside, as well as the inside, BUT it is really delicious okie ! Never judge a book by it's cover yo !!!!

The inside !

Satay !!!

This is roti prata as obvious as you can see, but it's not called roti prata in Ipoh. It's called roti canai ! See they very kind will help me cut my prata into pieces one hahahah !!!

Where the dogs stay. Super mega fierce dogs !!!!

Tesco is basically a mall, just like vivo city, paragon, Ion, etc.

My cousin's cousin !!! I swear he's goddamn adorable !!!! <3

Hais facepalm ! Cousin just too..... I guess we have the same genes HEHEH >:D !

 -Took a picture with both my cousin's cousins cuz they are just too adorable !!! <3-

-My family and I !!!! Without my dad cuz he wasn't there AND YES, NONE OF US LOOKS ALIKE-

Entire families togetherrrrrrrr hohoho ! I swear majority of the people's faces here damn fierce and serious can !!! Except for me and my cousin HAHAH !

My christmas presents ! Thankfulgirl98 !!! ^__~

I was on the bus travelling home alone and all these thoughts came to me. It's like how long bus rides always give you so many things to ponder about all the time, and the majority of them are all the sad things lol.

I just hate myself so much on the fact that I really really really don't know how to cherish someone, or some things and then tend to regret it for life later. I'd often tell people to always learn how to cherish someone or some things because nothing lasts forever but the thing is, I don't even do it myself. I'm so contradicting... 

Many often say, "Cherish those you have in your life because you never know when they won't be there anymore." That's like so easy for you or me to say, but having to do so is so damn hard to accomplish. It might be easy for you, but it's really impossible for me. The cold, hard fact lies here. Everybody dies someday, it's inevitable. That's why we are all bound to lose people in our life.

True, isn't it?

The thing about myself is that, whenever I tell myself to cherish this or that, I would. But it's not for long before I take them for granted or when I lose them then it is when I will only learn how to.

The one thing I fucking regret most in my life is being unable to cherish my grandmother when she was still alive. In the past, I used to detest her and I found her annoying. Why? Because back when I was much younger, I used to suck my thumb all the time to sleep and when she's around, I can't suck my thumb anymore because she will scold/hit me. I really love sucking my thumb like a lot, (i mean seriously, don't laugh !!) and she's like preventing me from doing my favourite hobby whenever she comes to Singapore from Ipoh, to take care of my siblings and me during the holidays.

Not only that, she likes to make bitter-tasting herbal teas and force me to drink/ don't let me play my Gameboy only after I practice the piano/ always don't allow me to feed myself, die also want feed me/ always using the cane as a form of threatening, etc.. These were some of the reasons why I didn't like it when she came over to Singapore. Hahahah ! Funny right, all these silly reasons.

But it was all due to the brainless, imbecile, foolish, ignorant, self-centered, and immature me, I did not think the way she did. I only knew what she was exactly doing for me only after she was gone.

Like, why was she always preventing me from sucking my thumb? Cuz it was a really bad and embarrassing habit.

Why did she always boil those bitter-tasting herbal teas for me and force me to drink? Cuz no damn herbal teas are sweet-tasting and every herbal tea is nutritious, nourishing and they are healthy. If she didn't bother about my health, she wouldn't even take hours to boil these herbal teas just for us to drink.

Why did she not allow me to play my gameboy, only after I practice finish my piano? Cuz my mum had told her not to let us play if we didn't complete our work. She'd get scolded if she allowed us to play without completing our work.

Why did she always insist on feeding me? Cuz she thinks that I was still unable to feed myself and she was afraid I might not be able to do so properly. Although she often uses the cane as a form of threatening, she has NEVER once caned us. She might use it and wave it around to make us scared, she will never hit us with it. All that she has done for me, they were only for one reason. That is, she loves me and I was so fucking dumb to only realise it when I was matured enough and that was too late, she has already left.

My grandmother is a great cook too, and she always cooks my favourite dishes all the time when I tell her to. She was always hanging the key-chains I gave her on her mini tree at her house and display them on the table. She was always singing this song to me whenever we were holding hands, walking. It goes like this, "走,走,走走走,我们小手拉小手,走,走,走走走,一同去郊游" Some of you might have heard of this song before probably. :-) 

As I grew older, I started to love her. She was the closest kin to me, more than my parents because she spends the most time with me the most. We often shared things among ourselves and she was damn open, please. My grandmother freaking told me about sex when I was only 8 years old, and I can still remember all the details HAHAHAH !!! :p I started to be really happy whenever she came over and I'll be like proudly telling her I how many days never suck my thumb already HAHAH !!!

It was on the 1st of August 2008 when I last talked to her on the phone, and that was the last communication I had with her when she was still alive. I still remember what we had chatted over the phone. It was her birthday, I wished her and I told her to come back to Singapore to cook for me. We made a promise, whoever comes back will have the chance to hit one's butt LOL !

So it's like if I came back to Malaysia, I can hit her butt, if she came back to Singapore, she could hit my butt. Hahahah !! Retarded right ! ^__^ Unfortunately, on the 2nd of September, 2008, just one month after I chatted with her, she passed away... She left when she was only 65 years old. Honestly, I'm really willing to give up 10 years or 20 years of my life for her to live I swear. Why did God take her away from me? Why? Till now I have no clue why she left. It's so painful... Even till now I cry whenever I think of her. I miss her so much...

The only thing she has left me with was the blanket she hand-sewed herself. Even till now I'm using it and I have been using it since I was 6 years old. I still remember all the silly jokes we shared and had together. Like whenever she sneezes, I will say, "没有讲 (never say) excuse me !" Then she will say, "excuse me" laughing. ^__^ Sometimes when I fight with my younger brother physically, my mother would throw us out of the house and my grandmother would always be the one to open the door for us... But not now anymore when I'm thrown out of the house hahah...

No one has ever cooked porridge or cooked anything for me when I'm having a fever, no one has ever massaged my leg for me when my leg's having a cramp, no one has ever patted me to sleep, and many more. These are the things only she has done for me and I doubt all these would even happen to me anymore.

This is a photo of my beloved grandmother, myself and my big brother. Taken on the 29/12/2001 as you can see in the photo, and that's when I was 3 years old. As you can see I'm like damn fair with a mushroom head and my grandmother was rather tan because she works under the sun in the past. (The colour of the photo came off at my head there cuz the photo is just too old paisehhh)

Even up till today, I still tend to take things for granted and then regret it later on. I guess this is merely human behavioral problems and it's literally inevitable. My family, my friends, people and things around me. I often fling them aside and take every moment they have with me for granted. Even when I try my best not to, I'll just forget and when I lose them, that's only when I know the true definition of having to cherish. It's always too late when I learn how to.

5 years have passed and I still miss her so much. If only you were still here, I really want to thank you for taking care of me all these years, I've never thanked you before and I'm so sorry... Sorry for being such a mischievous, rebellious and defiant grandchild to you. Even so, you're the closest and the only kin I love most. You're the only kin I have in this family who has show me what genuine family love is, and I can't thank you anymore for that. How are you? Are you enjoying your time in heaven now? I miss you...